The attack of the Strip Club Waitress

Are you doing OK honey? Yes I’m doing dine... can you please stop bother me and let me enjoy my drink? Thank you very much.

Another common dilemma we, strip clubs customers, have to experience every time we go to a strip club: “The Attack of the Strip Club Waitress”. We all know we can’t just go to a strip club and don’t consume any drink, if you want to seat on a table you need to order a drink. Strip Clubs make most of their money by selling alcohol. That’s why you paid six or seven dollar for a Corona, when for the same price you can buy a six pack at your local supermarket. Every time I order a bottle of water at a strip club (cost me $5.00 plus $1.00 tip), I think I can buy more twenty four bottles of water for the same price at Costco, BJ’s or Walmart.

So I bought a beer, picked a table, and chilled out for a bit. Not even 5 minutes passed and a waitress was already asking if I want another beer. “Are you doing OK honey, do you want another beer?”, “I’m good, thank you”. Sometimes they even grab your bottle and put it in the air to see if there is any beer left. I think that is too much. Sometimes I want to tell them: “Please let me enjoy my beer and the show, and if I need anything I will call you, and please stop bothering me”, but I'm polite, ended up saying: “Thank you sweetie, I’m OK right now”. The fact of the matter is that everybody knows waitresses make their money on tips, so the more beers you buy the better tip they will have.

A clear example of what I’m trying to say happened to me yesterday. I was with my pal chilling and decided to go to Solid Gold Fort Lauderdale, it was early in the day and they have a 2 for 1 domestic beer special. We asked the waitress for the special and she brought us four beers, all of them open. I can’t enjoy 2 beers open in front of me, I need one, and once I finished I can enjoy the other one. She could just give us 2 beers and keep the other ones on the fridge for when we need them later. But no, she needed to make a statement... what a biatch.

If there are any waitress reading this blog, please don’t take it the wrong way, we love you guys, the only thing we ask you is to wait for us to ask you for another drink, don’t put pressure on us, let us enjoy our beer and everybody will be happy.

Can you buy me a drink?

Waitresses and stripper work together. If you have a stripper in your table, chances are you are going to buy her drink, even thought they might disappear in a minute, my advice is don't buy a drink to the stripper as soon as she sit on your table, wait to she if she is worth it, and if she is going to stick around. I hate when I’m chilling with my stripper and a waitress come and ask the stripper If she wants a drink, that pissed me off, they should wait for me to ask the stripper if she wants a drink, or wait for me to order a drink for the stripper. When a stripper ask you for a drink, is not that she wants to hang with you, she just want to know if you have money in your pockets for a “lap dances”.

Probably I look like a cheap bastard. All I have to say is that I spend good money on strip clubs and that I tip well, but I have to say strippers and waitresses tricks make me sick. For example I hate when the stripper ask for a drink and the waitress bring her a drink that have more ice that liquor, or sometimes no liquor at all. It’s like paying $12.00 dollars for a sip of liquor or just juice. That is cheating.

I don’t want to bother you guys no more, its 6:00P.M. And I know at Solid Gold Fort Lauderdale you don’t pay parking before 7:00 P.M so I should get going. By the way, why do you have to pay $5.00 for parking at Solid Gold Fort Lauderdale, even if you don’t have a car, or even if you park your car 2 blocks down the street? That is a topic for a future post. Have a nice night and don’t forget to support single hard working moms.